When your kid is throwing food, it can feel helpless and frustrating to correct their behavior. Should you replace the food and just watch them do it again? Should you take the food away? Let’s talk about it!
Food throwing is a completely normal phase of toddler development. They are learning how to be independent while also engaging in fine motor skills for the first time. These two things combined often result to throwing their food whenever they can. 🙂
Your toddler might start throwing food as early as 6 months old, or when they first start solids. When does throwing food stop? Usually between 12-24 months old. However, understanding the root cause of food throwing is essential to stopping it.
Whether it’s a way to assert independence, explore cause and effect, or simply test boundaries, there are strategies you can employ to minimize food throwing and promote positive mealtime habits.
Let’s dive into some actionable tips to tackle this common challenge and foster a healthy relationship between your child and food.
Why are they throwing food?
Understanding why toddlers throw food can help you respond appropriately and guide your little one through this phase with patience and understanding.
They are exploring cause and effect (circular reactions)
Between 4-8 months old, children are learning circular reactions. This is when they learn that their actions get a response from other people, which causes them to repeat the action. They’re learning cause and effect!
This is a thrilling discovery of independence for toddlers! But it can result in them throwing their food over and over…..and over again.
They’re looking for a reaction
Because of these circular reactions, sometimes toddlers just want your response – even if it’s negative. Even if the attention is scolding or corrective, it still fulfills their need for interaction and engagement with you.
They’re simply testing boundaries and learning about cause and effect in their own unique way.
They’re not hungry
If you’re child isn’t hungry, throwing food might be simply a form of play. When food becomes a toy, they explore it as a sensory experience – squishing, smashing, and throwing.
They’re tired or emotional
When they’re tired or feeling overwhelmed by their emotions, food throwing might be their way of expressing frustration or seeking a release.
They can’t physically hold it
Coordination takes time to develop, and sometimes, those tiny hands just can’t grasp onto slippery or awkwardly shaped foods. Frustration sets in, leading to food flying across the room.
Now that we know the most common reasons why toddlers are throwing food, let’s discuss the 5 step process to get them to stop!
5 Steps to Stop Throwing Food
1. Don’t Give a Reaction
As hard as it may be, try to remain calm and neutral when your little one starts launching their food across the room. Reacting with frustration or amusement only reinforces the behavior and encourages them to continue.
2. State a Firm Boundary
Setting clear boundaries lets your toddler know that throwing food is not acceptable behavior. Use simple language in a neutral tone. Some examples include:
“Your cup goes on the table”
“Food goes in your mouth or stays on your plate”
“We don’t throw food”
While you’re stating this boundary, it’s also helpful to show your toddler a visual. Show them where their drink goes, demonstrate eating food, or place it on the plate for them.
3. Identify the Problem
Take a moment to observe why your toddler might be throwing food. Understanding the underlying cause can help you address the issue more effectively.
Are they….
- Bored?
- Wanting your reaction?
- Distracted?
- Not liking the food?
- Tired?
- Emotional?
- Not able to hold the food?
4. Address the Problem
Once you’ve identified the root cause, take steps to address it. You might not guess the right “root cause” immediately, so this might take a couple tries.
- Bored? → Remove them from meal time and offer an alternative form of play
- Wanting your reaction? → Give them engagement and interaction with your word and body language
- Distracted? → Remove the distractions (TV, dog, sensory stimulation like music, etc)
- Not liking the food? → Make sure there is a “safe food” offered at each meal/sanck
- Tired? → Remove them from meal time & offer the food at another time
- Emotional? → Remove them from meal time & offer the food at another time
- Not able to hold the food? → Offer the food in a different way! Cut differently, cover in breadcrumbs, to increase grip, offer a utensil, etc
5. Re-offer Food & Encourage Neutrality
Even if a majority of their plate ends up on the floor, make sure they are re-offered enough food to keep them full during the meal.
When food is re-offered, try to maintain food neutrality by avoiding using food rewards or bartering for food intake. This could be saying things like –
“If you finish all your food, you can eat this cookie”
“If you’re a good boy, you’ll take one more bite”
When we offer rewards for food intake or beg our children to eat, it discourages them from using their own hunger and fullness cues. Remind them (in a neutral way) that they can finish their meal if they are still hungry.
In conclusion, managing toddlers throwing food requires a balanced approach that combines understanding, patience, and proactive strategies.
By recognizing the underlying reasons behind food throwing and implementing the five-step approach outlined in this post, parents can effectively address the behavior while promoting positive mealtime habits.
For more help on toddler meal time behavior, read here about how to handle your toddler spitting out food.
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